


Almost is Never Enough

by poesgalaxygal



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:41:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24195295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poesgalaxygal/pseuds/poesgalaxygal
Summary: You and Poe have been best friends ever since you joined the resistance. You two hold a strong bond, and neither of you want anything to come between that. However, feelings take over, but when neither of you will admit to it, regret overcomes you and you spill your feelings the only way you know how: music.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Reader, Zorii Bliss/Poe Dameron
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	Almost is Never Enough

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was inspired by Ariana Grande's song Almost is Never Enough!!

You two were best friends. Inseparable. He always came over to your quarters to talk, eat, or simply just lay his head in your lap and sleep after a long mission. You had been best friends since you joined the resistance two years ago. You were trained by Poe to be a pilot and, quite frankly, you were one of the best out there. He would even admit it to you sometimes. And that was saying a lot for him. He used to think he was the best pilot out there. Until you came along. 

Poe had Finn and Rey, his two closest friends. But when you joined the resistance, his life flipped. He didn’t know why, but he felt attached to you right off the bat. You met him at the cantina one night. You were both fairly sober, and he introduced himself to you. “I know who you are, Commander” was your first line. He chuckled. “Well, I’m glad, because I think we are going to get along really well.”

Since that night, you two spent every single day together. You started to wonder when he was going to ask you to be his officially. But for some reason you didn’t want to take it further. You liked where you two stood. You could talk to him about anything. He was your best friend and you two developed a bond that you knew you wouldn’t ever find with anyone else. You were scared. You were scared that if you got into a relationship and it ended badly, you wouldn’t recover and you would lose the connection. Poe felt the same way. But secretly you both wanted each other. You wanted to be in his arms. He wanted to hold you. But you thought he didn’t want that, and he thought the same. 

It had been about a month since you had last been in the sky. A month since you crashed your X-Wing. A month since you severely injured yourself. Poe thought you were gone, that he would never get the chance to tell you he loved you. But when you woke up on the medbay, he tried. He tried to tell you he loved you. But you wouldn’t let him get the chance. You would talk about everything else under the sun to distract yourself from the fact that General Organa was grounding you for two months. So he didn’t. He didn’t want to tell you, just in case you couldn’t say it back. 

Since you had been grounded, you picked up a new hobby; songwriting. You always loved music. It calms you down. It kept your mind off the fact that you wanted to be up and flying. Flying with him. 

You had written about two songs by now, and you always made sure Poe would look them over. He would even pull out his guitar and try to compose it for you. Stars, he was the one for you. But you couldn’t tell him that. 

It was late one night, you were on the couch, hair wrapped up in a messy bun and you were wearing one of Poe's shirts. That was normal for you. He let you borrow his clothes all of the time. It was basically like you were dating. But you weren’t. Hundreds of scribbled papers covered the coffee table. You let out a deep sigh as you tried to come up with your next lyric, but you were snapped out of your thoughts as the door to your quarters slid open. Your eyes snapped to your best friend. Why was he here this late?

“Hey.” You smiled softly. “What are you doing here?” You asked as you put the piece of paper down, mixing it with all of the other songs you would never even think about composing. “It’s past midnight.” 

He looked at you sadly, shuffling his feet. “I’m going away for a while.” 

Your smile dropped. “What do you mean you’re going away for a while? Is there a mission? Are you being sent to spy on the first order?” You walked toward him, arms crossed. 

He shook his head. “I’m going to Kijimii for a while. General gave me some time off. I’m going to see uh...an old friend.” He smiled softly at you. 

You were confused, but nodded. Normally on his days off he stayed with you. Especially now, what with you being grounded and all. You got lonely. Something was off. You swallowed hard. “Who?” You already knew the answer. 

“Zorii Bliss. You remember her, don’t you?” He asked, running his hands through his hair nervously. 

Boy did you remember. You knew all the stories. About how they were a thing before he left the resistance. How he didn’t know how she still felt, but that it didn’t matter anymore because he was here and she was there. 

Tears welded in your eyes. Why the hell was he going to spend time with Zorii? Was he still in love with her? You were hurt. You did a damn good job hiding it, though. 

Poe waited for a response. Anything that showed him you cared. That you wanted him to stay. That you were furious. That you loved him. Loved him in the way he loved you. 

“Oh. Yeah. Yeah, I remember. That’ll um, that’ll be nice. To catch up.” You had turned away from him now, walking to the kitchen to make yourself some caf. Why? It was nearly 1am. Whatever you could do to keep your mind off of the fact that he was leaving to be with her. Someone that wasn’t you. 

He sighed, not moving from where you had left him. “Yeah. I, uhm, I’m leaving early, but I wanted to come and let you know, if you don’t see me around for a while, that’s where I am. I don’t want you to worry or anything.” He was digging. Digging for that part of you that would confess your love for him. But you didn’t. 

You nodded, your eyes not leaving the cafmaker. “I appreciate it. Thanks, bubs.” Your nickname for him. 

He nodded again, biting his lip and looking down. “Alright.” 

You sighed, closing your eyes to let the tears flow, hoping he couldn’t see. When you were sure they were gone, you turned to him, smiling softly. He walked to you, pulling you into his embrace. “Be safe, have fun.” You said into his chest. Tell him, dammit. 

He kissed your forehead. “I will.” He said before pulling away and heading toward the door. He took his time, hoping you would say something, anything, to get him to stay. He didn’t really want to go, but he knew that if you weren’t going to admit you loved him, he wasn’t going to, and he couldn’t keep dwelling on it forever. He needed to move on. 

You didn’t say anything, just smiling softly as he left. Once he was gone, you threw your head into your hands groaning loudly. “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” You snapped. You knew right then and there you should have told him, that you needed to tell him. You decided to wait. Wait until he comes back, you thought. Run up to him and kiss him. Tell him you love him and that you want him and you need him and that you want to be his forever. 

A week and a half passed, and Poe hadn’t come back to your quarters. You had tried going to his, but they were empty. You weren’t sure how long General Organa gave him off, but you were getting antsy and you needed to see and talk to your best friend. 

Him being away wasn’t new. He would often go on missions that lasted two weeks, or even a month. Sometimes you would be with him, sometimes you were on a different mission. But this was different. You were waiting for him to come back so that you could finally do what you should have done a long time ago. 

Finally, you heard the sound of an X-Wing landing in the hangar. You ran, waiting for him to hop out. As he did, you smiled softly. He pulled his helmet off, looking at you. You began to head toward him until you heard the sound of another X-Wing pulling up. Your smile dropped. No. 

You watched the woman get out of her ship, making her way to Poe. She took off her maroon helmet, letting her beautiful brown hair flow down her shoulders. Stars, she was beautiful. She wrapped her arms around Poe, kissing him softly. That’s when you knew. You were too late. Why didn’t you do this before he left? For kriffing sake, he wanted you to. 

You turned away from the new couple, immediately walking toward your quarters. Tears swelled your face as you picked up the pace. When you reached your quarters, you were sobbing. You entered and immediately collapsed to the floor. You were angry. But not at him, at yourself. You leaned your head up against the wall, sniffling and wiping the tears from your eyes. You took a deep breath. Stop. It’s not like he cheated on you. You were never dating in the first place, you reminded yourself. Poe Dameron may not have been yours to hold every night, but he was still your best friend.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
A few months passed. You had been flying again, going on missions with Poe and on your own. Poe wasn’t visiting you as often since he was with Zorii, but he would come over every now and then. Zorii didn’t mind. In fact, she admired your friendship. She wasn’t aware of your feelings, but that’s only because you are a damn good actor and you were slowly forcing yourself to get over him. At least you thought. 

Although you were back up and flying, you continued to write music. Every now and then, you got a gig at the cantina to play your own music. More times than others, Poe would play guitar as you sang. It was nice. But it was hurting. Everytime you finished, you wanted to lean over and kiss him and tell him you loved him, but you couldn’t. One night it struck you that you may never be able to, when Poe and Zorii walked into the cantina, a ring on her finger. You were sitting at the bar when you saw them. You looked at your drink in your hands, swallowing hard. 

People around you were cheering and congratulating the couple for their engagement. The noise burned your ears. Finally, Poe reached you, placing his hand on your shoulder and massaging softly. “Hey. I’m sure by now you’ve heard, but Zor-”

“I heard. Congratulations, Poe. I’m really happy for you.” You looked up at him with soft eyes. He looked down at you, taken aback from your tone. You stood up, pushing past him and heading up towards the small stage the cantina had put together for you and Poe to perform. Poe watched you. You weren’t supposed to perform tonight. At least, he didn’t know that you were. 

You sat on the barstool and took a deep breath. “Hi. Um, I’m Y/N, but you already know that.” You looked around as people started to quiet down, gazing towards Poe, wondering why he wasn’t up there in his usual spot. 

“I, uh, I’ve been working on a song, I uh, didn’t think I would ever perform it but, I felt like this was the perfect time.” You started to tear up. 

Poe's face dropped, but Zorii came up to him, hugging him from behind. He smiled softly and kissed her head before leading her to a table in which they both sat down. He didn’t know if Zorii was trying to talk to him or not, but he was focused on you. 

“This is Almost is Never Enough.” You nodded at the pianist, who took out the sheet music you had handed to him. He began to play as you looked down, grabbing the mic. 

I’d like to say we gave it a try.  
I’d like to blame it all on life.  
Maybe we just weren’t right.  
But that’s a lie, that’s a lie. 

You sang as your gaze made it to Poes. His eyes showed you that he knew. He knew exactly what you were singing about, and who you were singing about. His hand dropped from Zoriis. 

And we can deny it as much as we want  
But its time our feelings were shown.  
Cause sooner or later, we’ll wonder why we gave up  
The truth is that everyone knows.

Poe swallowed hard, trying to keep himself from crying. By this point, Zorii had noticed. She sighed heavily and looked at you, then back at him. “Poe..” she said. “Go. Tell her.” His head snapped to face hers. “What?”

“You think I haven’t noticed the way you look at her? Poe..Go.” She took off her ring, placing it in the palm of his hand before kissing his cheek softly. “I mean it.” she smiled softly.

Almost. Almost is never enough.  
So close to being in love.  
If I had known you had wanted me, the way I wanted you.  
Then maybe we wouldn’t be two worlds apart  
But right here in eachothers arms. 

You had to stop for a moment, your voice cracking as you sang. You looked down at your feet and back up again to see tears in Poes eyes. You didn’t mean for this to happen, but you needed to let him know. And what better way to do it with a song? You hadn’t seen Zorii take off her ring. 

Poe stood up, slowly pushing past everyone until he reached the front of the small stage. You finished your song. 

Almost. We almost knew what love was,  
But almost is never enough. 

Silence filled the room as Poe got onto the stage, pulling you up to your feet. You looked down, speaking softly. “I’m sorry. I know you’re hap-” he cut you off by lifting your chin to look up at him. He shook his head. “There is no almost. I do love you.” He said. You looked at him in confusion. You searched for Zorii in the audience. She was smiling and nodding in your direction, and a breathy, confused chuckle escaped your lips. You looked up at your best friend, whose eyes never left your lips. “I thought, I thought this whole time you didn’t-” you started. You were cut off by his lips against yours firmly. Your hands snaked around his neck, softly finding their way to his hair. His hands pressed softly to your hips. After a few seconds, he pulled away. “You are the biggest idiot.” he laughed.

You pulled further away. “Excuse me?” 

“All this time I had been waiting for you to tell me how you felt.” He said, forehead pressing against yours. 

You cleared your throat. “Well, I did now..” you laughed. By this time, people had lost interest and began drinking and dancing again. Besides, they kinda needed a pick-me-up after you brought down the mood with your song. 

Poe smiled and shook his head. “I think you need to write a song about everything you feel. You express more that way. Because, stars, I tried to get it out of you. Now I know what I need to do. Make you write a song about it.” He smirked. 

You pulled away and laughed. “I love you, Poe. I should have told you before you left for Kijimii, I just thought-” 

“No, no it’s okay. I understand. You’re my best friend. You wanted to be supportive. Trust me, I get it. I shouldn’t have gone. I should have told you how I felt. Just...it doesn’t matter now” He kissed your forehead. 

“What about Zorii?” You asked softly, looking over at her. 

He smiled softly, resting his head on yours as he watched her dancing with another pilot. “I think she’ll be okay” He said. You smiled as you felt completely relaxed, content in his arms. This is what you wanted, needed after all of these years. Finally. You two would be okay. You knew that after all this, you would be more than okay. You would be sure to tell him everything now. No more miscommunication and keeping secrets. Just you and Poe. Together. 

“Now, let’s get off this stage and head back to your quarters. I want to see what other stuff you’ve been working on.”

You laughed as you took his hand, walking out of the cantina. “I don’t think you do”. You gripped his hand tighter. 

Maker, please don’t let him see ‘break up with your girlfriend, im bored’.


End file.
